It’s a cozy Sunday morning, your partner and you are slowly stirring up to a late brunch and suddenly you both are in the ‘mood’. You will both lock the door of the bedroom (or maybe not), only to realise that there are no condoms left. Phew! You think let’s not ruin the moment and doing it once without a condom won’t make a difference. Stop right there! Let me tell you that many such Sunday mornings may come, but one without safe sex can lead to consequences you don’t want to face later.
How to ensure having Safe Sex?
- An enthusiastic ‘YES”!
More than often, sex is seen as a reproductive activity rather than the pleasure seeking one. A simple yes is believed to be ‘yes’ for sex, without checking if they are really into it. That’s why an enthusiastic ‘YES’ is what we preach because only then the sex will be pleasurable for both parties. Phrases like ‘I’m not in the mood’ or ‘I’m not sure’ should not be taken personally. Even if it’s not a “NO”, it’s not a “YES” either. So, when we talk about consent, let’s not forget that passionate consent is what makes sex unforgettable!
- Open to get tested for STIs before indulging in any sexual activity
Like your regular health check-ups, don’t forget to get an STI checkup every time you change sexual partners. Even though you are in a monogamous relationship, getting sexual and reproductive health check-ups is a must. When anyone asks you to get checked, don’t get offended. On the other hand, it should be seen as a sign of affection & care for your partner. As you don’t have to judge a book by its cover, a healthy person can be infected too. So, think when was the last time you got tested?
[STDs and STIs are very common among sexually active youth. However, most of you do not take medical help unless and until you are convinced that you need to see a doctor. Why wait till it gets bad? If you suspect you have an infection, talk to us now. We will make sure no doctor treats you badly. Reach out to us by clicking on the Whatsapp chat button: ]
- Discussion on which contraceptive to use
The core of safe sex is protecting yourself from STIs which can be practiced only when sex is performed in such a manner where there is no exchange of bodily fluids like semen, vaginal discharge, menstrual blood etc. Hence, choosing contraception that prevents this is very important. Male and female condoms are your best buddies for this. These barrier methods of contraception drastically reduce your chances of catching an STI. Also, condoms come handy when you or your partner are in an open relationship and are with multiple partners. If you choose to use other contraceptives, make sure you both get tested often. Proper knowledge on how to use these contraceptives is a must!
[Contraception options are aplenty in healthcare. But do you know what suits you best? Are you unsure of going to a doctor for fear of judgment? We can help you. Talk to us now by clicking on the Whatsapp chat button: ]
- Communicate your likes/dislikes in a sexual activity
Vaginal or anal sex? With or without lubricants? Spice it up with sex toys? There are so many things you can do to have your partner reach the climax and have an orgasm. However, who knows their body better than themselves right? With every move asking your partner if they like or dislike a particular activity can boost trust, pleasure and mutual respect for each other. That is 100% safe and recommended.
- Consider sex as pleasure rewarding and not pleasure determining
Sometimes a person can develop performance anxiety when having sex. The only reason I will feel happy is by getting ‘more and more sex’ where sex becomes a sole determiner of your relationship is not safe. The emotional intelligence that sex is just a part of your life without putting it on such a pedestal, can make sex to be pleasure rewarding. Next time question yourself, do I really want to have sex or I am doing it to be cool?
The traditional beliefs of safe sex were mainly to prevent the spread of STI’s and unwanted pregnancies. As the world around us gets more well informed, other aspects of safe sex should also be well-thought of. The emotional side of safe sex takes into account the enthusiasm to have sex, contraception choice, likes/dislikes and the motive behind having sex. In a world, where casual and open relationships are having space, sex should never be abused. Whatever is the nature of the relationship between two people, sex is always a pleasure matter. Don’t make it into another tension of your life!
About the Author: Vidhi Gada
She is a 4th-year law student from ILS Law College, Pune, who firmly believes the law can be used as a weapon of change in our country and thus began her journey in the field of law. Apart from trying her best to be updated with all the legislations, her interests lie in Human Rights & Intellectual Property Rights. The best way to connect with her is to suggest a song that sets her mood and also, dogs. No! Kidding, she loves all the animals! She really likes dancing, writing and making puns!
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